Embracing My Greatest Teachers – And Honouring the Lessons Beneath the Lessons
Hello, Friends, and thank you for being here!
Who have been your greatest teachers?
Was it someone from school, a caregiver, a sibling—or someone who challenged you in ways you didn’t fully understand until years later?
I’ve been lucky to have had some truly wonderful teachers throughout my life. But interestingly, some of the most powerful lessons came through unlearning what they taught me. That’s not to say I didn’t receive anything meaningful from them, but it does mean I now get to choose what I want to carry forward—and what I gently set down.
Most of us learned from those closest to us—how to express (or suppress) anger, how to deal with disappointment, how to seek connection. We learned what we had to do to feel seen, safe, and loved. And often, those lessons weren’t taught directly—they were modelled.
Without realizing it, I internalized all sorts of beliefs and behaviours just to make it through.
I learned that getting near-perfect grades made me feel closer to my dad—something that felt especially important when I struggled to feel connected to my mom.
I learned that anticipating other people’s needs made me feel valued—and in turn, emotionally safe.
These patterns stayed with me long into adulthood—until I began to notice the impact they were having. Now, as I meet myself with more compassion and curiosity, I understand why I learned them in the first place…and I get to decide which ones still align with my core values and how I want to move through the world.
So many of us have spent years becoming who we thought we needed to be. Now, we have the opportunity to untangle those patterns—to be who we were born to be.
Here are a few of the biggest lessons I’ve been unlearning:
What other people think of me matters more than what I think: I used to base my worth on others’ approval. Now, I know that real peace comes from self-trust, not people-pleasing.
Success is material: I chased external markers of success until I realized that alignment, joy, and meaning matter more than status or income.
Money is hard to come by: I grew up believing that financial struggle was inevitable. I’m still rewriting this one, but I’m learning that money can come from ease, not just hustle.
Putting others before myself makes me a good person: I thought self-sacrifice was love. Now I understand that honouring my needs helps me show up with more presence and integrity.
Showing emotion is a sign of weakness: I used to fear that being sensitive meant I wasn’t strong. Now I see that vulnerability is strength.
Someone else knows what’s best for me: I once looked outside myself for guidance. Now I tune into my inner wisdom—and remind myself that I’m allowed to trust it.
Being liked is more important than being authentic: I used to shape-shift to be accepted. Now I’m learning that being true to myself invites deeper, more aligned connection.
Many of these lessons were passed down to me without a single word.
I watched. I absorbed. I adapted. And even though they no longer serve me, I’m grateful for the version of me who learned them—because she was doing the very best she could with what she had.
And now?
Now, I get to choose differently.
With each intentional choice of which lessons I want to hold on to, and which ones I’m ready to release, I come home to myself a little more. I make room for balance, sovereignty, and self-trust. I rewrite what love, strength, and success mean—on my terms.
And maybe that’s the greatest lesson of all:
We don’t just learn from others. We grow when we have the courage to ask—do I still believe this? Does this still serve me?
We honour our teachers, not by blindly following them, but by evolving beyond what they had the tools to teach.
With heartfelt gratitude,
Christina
